Sunday Postcards: [First Name], personalization is broken

Much like my caffeine intake during BFCM, this is intentional chaos.

Heyyyyy Sunday fam!

Thanksgiving week is here, and with it, the chaos of BFCM. It’s everywhere: “50% OFF!” emails that all look the same, carousel ads shouting sitewide discounts, and TikTok teasers with flashy countdowns. It feels like every brand is screaming to be heard, creating a megaphone of noise that’s impossible to escape.

And the result? We’ve trained consumers to expect that every deal must be 50% off—or practically free—to even count. This relentless focus on discounts has cheapened the shopping experience and turned it into a transactional race to the bottom.

Personalization is supposed to fix this, but let’s be honest—it rarely does. A first name in an email or a recycled product recommendation isn’t personal; it’s predictable. In the frenzy of BFCM, it feels more like a box brands check than a meaningful effort to connect.

The real winners this season won’t be the loudest or the ones with the steepest discounts. They’ll be the brands that rise above the noise and create moments of genuine connection—the kind that make customers pause and think, “This brand gets me.”

So, let’s talk about what real personalization looks like during the busiest shopping week of the year—and why it’s your secret weapon to cutting through the chaos. I warn you…this edition is spicy…

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[First Name], Personalization is Broken

Why Standard Personalization Falls Flat During BFCM

Let’s face it….most personalization strategies during BFCM miss the mark. Overused tactics like product recommendations or dynamic discounts—things that feel personal on paper—often come off as lazy or irrelevant. (Yes, I said it.)

Take Amazon, a brand known for personalization, yet last holiday season, many users were shown deals for products they’d already purchased or loosely related items. Imagine logging in and seeing a discount on a coffee maker you just bought or books you’ve already read. Instead of adding value, these recycled recommendations felt disconnected, especially during the high-stakes BFCM rush.

BFCM shoppers are overwhelmed and crave speed and simplicity. Irrelevant suggestions or poorly timed messaging just add to the chaos. Personalization during this time should reduce friction by anticipating what consumers need now—whether that’s complementary products, timely deals, or exclusive perks—and delivering it thoughtfully.

Winning brands won’t just rely on algorithms; they’ll use personalization to create clarity and connection. It’s not about knowing what’s in a shopper’s cart—it’s about showing you understand their journey.

The Emotional Role of Personalization During BFCM

BFCM is not just about what you sell—it’s about how you make shoppers feel. Amid the chaos of deals and discounts, consumers are juggling excitement, stress, and guilt, all while trying to make the best decisions.

During BFCM, personalization should address three emotional needs that consumers subconsciously seek:

1. Valued: Shoppers ask themselves, “Am I getting something special for my loyalty?” 

They don’t just want to be another email address on your list; they want to feel like their repeat purchases, their trust, and their engagement matter. Brands that go beyond transactional gestures—like early access or loyalty rewards—create a sense of belonging and exclusivity.

2. Efficient: Consumers are overwhelmed. They ask, “Are you helping me save time and mental energy?” 

Personalization should simplify decision-making. This means more than showing products they’ve browsed; it means curating solutions that align with their mindset during BFCM, whether it’s gifting, self-care, or seasonal essentials.

3. Recognized: At the heart of personalization is the question, “Do you see me beyond just my wallet?” 

This is where many brands fail—they rely on purchase history but ignore the nuances of behavior, values, or preferences that make a consumer feel truly understood.

Personalization as a BFCM Differentiator

The playbook for personalization is often on autopilot. But during BFCM—the most transactional time of the year—standard tactics like early access or product recommendations aren’t enough. Instead, personalization should reframe the customer’s experience, offering moments of relief, clarity, or delight amid the frenzy.

This isn’t about more noise or bigger discounts; it’s about solving problems and adding value. For example, instead of sending a generic discount, a brand like Parachute Home could use past purchase data to say, “Cold weather is here—did you know your sheets last longer with these care tips? Bonus: Here’s 20% off cozy flannel replacements.”

Exclusivity also works best when it creates intimacy, not urgency. Why not invite top-tier customers to something unexpected, like a live shopping experience or behind-the-scenes product stories? It’s more meaningful than a simple “early access” email.

Finally, brands like Glossier shine when they personalize based on behavior, not just data. Instead of a “You left this in your cart” email, they could reframe the message: “We noticed you’ve been eyeing Boy Brow—don’t worry, it’s saved for you. No rush.” This empathetic tone reduces pressure and builds trust.

True personalization during BFCM isn’t about algorithms—it’s about human gestures. Winning brands will ask, How can we make this moment better for our customers? The answer redefines what personalization can be when the stakes are highest.

Beyond BFCM: Building Loyalty Through Authentic Personalization

I’ve said it before, and I am going to keep saying it….The real challenge of BFCM personalization isn’t just standing out—it’s leaving an emotional impression that LASTS. While short-term wins are tempting, the brands that succeed use this season to deepen loyalty, not just drive sales.

Authentic personalization shows customers they’re more than buyers. A simple post-purchase message like “Thanks for shopping with us during BFCM—here are tips to get the most out of your new product” creates trust and leaves a lasting impact.

Some brands take this further by celebrating customer choices. Imagine a skincare brand sending a personalized recap of purchases with a guide to building a routine—helping customers feel confident about their decisions.

Done right, BFCM becomes more than a shopping frenzy. It’s a chance to strengthen relationships and remind customers why they chose your brand in the first place.

My Personalization Checklist (and Yes, I’m Checking It Twice 🎅)

Most advice on personalization gets stuck in the mechanics—data, segmentation, tweaking offers—but forgets the why. It’s not just about what customers want; it’s about understanding how they feel and making their experience better.

My gift to you is leaving you with my “personalization checklist”:

1. Tap Into Anticipation

• Use past behavior to create certainty and guide purchases.

Example: “You’ve been eyeing the Brightening Serum—it’s in our top-tier deals just for you.”

2. Simplify Decisions

• Reduce overwhelm by framing options as solutions, not just products.

Example: Product carousels labeled “For gifting,” “For staying cozy,” help cut through the noise.

3. Make Exclusivity Feel Special

• Frame VIP access as reserved, not rushed.

Example: “We saved this for you: Exclusive access to our most-loved styles before the crowds arrive.”

4. Acknowledge Decision Fatigue

• Empathize with stressed shoppers through calming, helpful messaging.

Example: An influencer partnership that says, “Feeling overwhelmed? Here’s your ultimate gift guide.”

5. Give First, Build Trust

• Use small, thoughtful gestures to spark loyalty.

Example: “We noticed you loved our leggings—here’s a free workout guide to help you feel your best.”

6. Reinforce Identity

• Align messaging with your customer’s self-image or aspirations.

Example: “For someone who values comfort and style, these limited-edition throws are perfect for your space.”

The brands that win this BFCM won’t just know their customers—they’ll connect with them, reduce the chaos, and make every interaction feel intentional. Personalization isn’t about algorithms—it’s about moments that matter. And when you do it right, it’s not just BFCM wins you’re racking up—it’s loyalty that lasts far beyond the season.

I want to see you win, bestie—but sometimes that means having the tough conversations about ditching outdated marketing tactics. Let’s level up together!

That’s it for this week! Next week, I’ll dive deeper into consumer behavior, marketing tactics, and CX strategies to help you crush your brand goals in 2025.

Happy personalizing (and deal hunting)! 🎄

If you enjoyed this newsletter, sharing it with your homies would be the jam to me! You can share the party by sharing this link.

Jess
Founder of Open Late Collective

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👐 BONUS CONTENT 👐

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  1. Above The Fold Podcast - This week I was joined by the baddie Lucy Samuel, a pervious comedy writer turned copywriter for ecommerce brands. Check out the episode here and/or watch it here.

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